Hold tight. We're in for nasty weather.
Sunday, July 25th, 2004 02:35 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
erikaWhy do I get so fucking upset for no reason? One little thing doesn't go my way, I don't get exactly what I want, and here I am, throwing temper tantrums and crying.
Why is dealing with my emotions so fucking difficult? I whimper and I bawl and I want to throw things, break things, make the whole world fucked up like the thoughts inside my head tell me I am.
Why do I burst into tears and have thoughts repeat in my head over and over again until I would do anything to make them stop?
I don't know. I'm tired of this. I'm tired of constantly questioning everything good and important in my life because something must be making me feel like this.
I hate that these sweeping MOODS just come over me, and I make big, momentuous, sweeping changes that just fuck everything up.
I scream and sob like the world is ending, like the police are questioning me, like I'm getting fired for no reason, like my parents are yelling at me, like my house just burnt down, like my boyfriend of two years broke up with me, like my brother is hitting me again, like something is actually happening like shit that has happened to me in the past, instead of this mess of jumbled up histronics.
Nothing is wrong, and yet there I go again, and I can't stop myself before it starts, no matter how fucking hard I try.
Why is dealing with my emotions so fucking difficult? I whimper and I bawl and I want to throw things, break things, make the whole world fucked up like the thoughts inside my head tell me I am.
Why do I burst into tears and have thoughts repeat in my head over and over again until I would do anything to make them stop?
I don't know. I'm tired of this. I'm tired of constantly questioning everything good and important in my life because something must be making me feel like this.
I hate that these sweeping MOODS just come over me, and I make big, momentuous, sweeping changes that just fuck everything up.
I scream and sob like the world is ending, like the police are questioning me, like I'm getting fired for no reason, like my parents are yelling at me, like my house just burnt down, like my boyfriend of two years broke up with me, like my brother is hitting me again, like something is actually happening like shit that has happened to me in the past, instead of this mess of jumbled up histronics.
Nothing is wrong, and yet there I go again, and I can't stop myself before it starts, no matter how fucking hard I try.
