what's hiding in my head

Things I Need To Write About:

Now, in easy to digest outline format! Try it at home!

I) Why I love living in this house, with these guys. (Guys refers to both John, roommate, & S, boyfriend.)
     A) They put the toilet seat down, but not the lid. Because their mommas trained 'em right.

     B) They eat anything I cook.
          1. Anything.
          2. Watery stuffing? They're there.
          3. Runny omelettes? Hey, it's all good.
          4. (In all truth, I am a damn fine cook. Most of the time, and with about 5 dishes. But it's nice that my mistakes don't go to waste.)

     C) They buy food. And don't get cranky when I eat it. Except with the junk food (see below.)

     D) Very quiet companions. Except for the occasional MOTHERFUCKING BITCH and DIE COCKSUCKER emanating from their rooms when they're playing a shooter, you'd never know they're there.

     E) Totally okay with sharing. Food, shampoo, toothpaste, computer games, computers, band-aids . . . See "their mommas trained them right", above.

     F) Totally okay with not bitching about oversharing. Fart? Drip menstrual blood on the bathroom floor and not notice it? Forget to flush? Smell really bad? Don't worry, you'll never hear it from your considerate roommates. (Not that I have done ANY OF THESE THINGS. I DO NOT BLEED OR FART.)


II) Why I Suck To Live With:
     A) I will eat all of your junk food.
          1. S is particularly not fond of this trait of mine.
               a. I maintain it's because I grew up in a house with six people. If you wanted to eat something junky, you'd better eat it NOW and as much as you could stand, or it'd be gone before you got a taste.
               b. S maintains I do this because I am evil incarnate and exist only to aggravate him. (I may be exaggerating slightly.)
          2. However, since I am the one who cooks all the time and washes all the dishes and goes to the convenience store or donut shop when we have a sweet tooth craving or a desperate urge for milk... COME ON!

     B) I will take your copy of Atlas Shrugged with me into the bathroom any time I'm expecting to spend some Quality Time in there.

     C) I take really long showers.
          1. 45 minutes is pretty much the shortest shower I'll ever take. I've taken three hour showers before. This may stop shortly when I will be paying mine own water bill.
          2. Or, you know, not. Goddddd, I love taking long showers.

     D) It's impossible to have a rational discussion with me.
          1. Case in point: earlier today, I burst into tears while discussing how much my parents should really be paying for a laptop for me.
               a. Interesting side note: S is the ONLY person I have EVER met, ever ever ever, who says I am not stubborn enough. I ask you: Am I not stubborn? WTF is he thinking?
               b. (I will tell you what he is thinking. He is thinking that I give up easily when I get frustrated. Well, yes, indeedy. When all my efforts get me exactly jackshit, strangely, I stop trying. This is bizarro to S and seems perfectly natural to me.)
                    i. I'm right on this one, aren't I?
                    ii. come on, I'm totally right.
                    iii. It's not like I don't try hard when it's really important to me!
                    iv. It's just that, you know, sometimes finishing a game I wasn't really enjoying or winning a dumb "discussion" is not really that important to me.
               c. Yes, he really said you're not stubborn enough.

     E) I stay up until all hours of the night.
          1. I hear that somewhere out there people don't do that. I do not believe I am acquainted with these "people".
               a. Even my MOTHER stays up late.