[translation of former entry]
Thursday, September 27th, 2007 09:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
erika[not a precise translation]
In a beautiful language, with my broken tongue:
I am sure that you have forgotten me completely... almost. You think of me, if you think of me, perhaps, in the most difficult moments—maybe only in the times when you're thinking about the gaps in your life.
I'm afraid that perhaps, if and when you ever think of me, you're happy. You're happy about all that you've left behind. A difficult crazy fat woman, always talking about crap you'd rather forget.
So, although I'm thinking of you, I know you don't think of me.
And sometimes, I try to be okay with your decision to forget me. Because most of the time, I too would like to forget myself, would like to fold this tired husk into a drawer and put the good parts into another body that's more content with the world, a mind a little bit less crazy.
... I know that I can't do that. But you already have done that, by leaving me. And because you could leave me, I'm jealous. So forgive me. For my jealousy, even if you can't forgive me for anything else.
In a beautiful language, with my broken tongue:
I am sure that you have forgotten me completely... almost. You think of me, if you think of me, perhaps, in the most difficult moments—maybe only in the times when you're thinking about the gaps in your life.
I'm afraid that perhaps, if and when you ever think of me, you're happy. You're happy about all that you've left behind. A difficult crazy fat woman, always talking about crap you'd rather forget.
So, although I'm thinking of you, I know you don't think of me.
And sometimes, I try to be okay with your decision to forget me. Because most of the time, I too would like to forget myself, would like to fold this tired husk into a drawer and put the good parts into another body that's more content with the world, a mind a little bit less crazy.
... I know that I can't do that. But you already have done that, by leaving me. And because you could leave me, I'm jealous. So forgive me. For my jealousy, even if you can't forgive me for anything else.
