now the drugs don't work, they just make you worse

[erika]

So I've been off my antidepressants (hereafter referred to as ADs) for about 3 weeks. It wasn't planned; I had an appointment with my psychiatrist at a time which would've allowed me to refill my meds, but then my grandmother got sick and I had to cancel.

Sure, I could've called the clinic and gotten a refill. That probably would've been the best option, but the weird thing is that basically nothing's changed. My mood hasn't gone appreciably downhill, and I feel a little more irritated with the world, that's about it.

(I didn't get any withdrawal symptoms, either. I might as well have been taking sugar pills.)

Anyway, so ... ADs. Bust. I've taken some SSRIs (made it worse), all the SNRIs (sugar pills), and even Wellbutrin (NDRI) didn't make a dent.

I have a psychiatrist appointment on Monday and I'll bring up Lamictal (a mood stabilizer with antidepressant qualities) then. Maybe that'll do something.

I kind of doubt it, but I'm running out of options.

Comments

[springheel_jack]

It's possible that the AD's did nothing, but it's also possible the other shoe hasn't dropped yet. I once cold-turkeyed on Wellbutrin and felt fine for a month. Then, kablammo.

I think asking about a mood stabilizer like lamictal or depakote is a good idea. I am just trying one of those now for the first time and the result is pretty good so far.

You can also ask about one of the atypical antipsychotics like abilify. I was unable to tolerate abilify (I got the akathisia side effect, but a lot of people swear by it.

It may also make sense to try one of those -with- a more standard antidepressant like an SSRI.

There's also tricyclics and MAOIs - not idea meds but sometimes they work for people when nothing else does.

I've spent years coasting with very sub-optimal drug responses. It's good not to wait and wait to try to make a med change like I did.

[erika]

Already taking Abilify, and it's been very helpful.

[springheel_jack]

ah, okay

[springheel_jack]

after all the meds there's still transcranial magnets to try.

[erika]

I know! Or implants that will shock me, or getting shocked into a seizure.

... sigh. Somehow that doesn't make me feel better, y'know?

(sorry if my first comment seemed a little terse, I appreciate your commenting.)

[rydra_wong]

Seconding the other shoe possibility; not pleasant to have to consider, but in my experience I can do the cartoon roadrunner thing for a few weeks before I crash.

OTOH, if it turns out the meds have been doing fuck all, then that opens up the possibility that the right meds could get you a lot better.

FWIW, Lamictal dragged a friend of mine out of the pit after two years of continuous suicidal depression which had resisted every med on the planet and ECT too (we met in hospital).

Which is not to say that Lamictal is inherently a magic bullet, but that there's an understandable tendency to assume that if X number of meds have failed, the next ones aren't going to do much -- maybe they'll help a bit, but not really. And this is not the case. There are people for whom the MAOIs are their BANG ALL BETTER NOW drug.

I don't mean to be all la la la optimism at you, because the meds roundabout is a grisly place to be, and I remember being so scared and despairing that anything would work. This is shit. But there are possibilities left on the table. And this is a friend who I was really, really scared wouldn't make it.

[erika]

I don't mean to be so pessimistic; I think this entry was mostly the depression talking, because there are things that have helped. Adderall raises my mood considerably, for example. Abilify (mourning!) cut my anxiety by 90%. So I haven't lost all hope yet.

It's just so frustrating that no one knows what will work for any given person. And the side effects are no joke; I'm already mildly allergic to perfumes and Lamictal has a reputation for increasing allergenic reactions.

Doesn't mean I'm not going to bring it up at my next pdoc appointment, though.

And thank you for commenting.

[rydra_wong]

I don't mean to be so pessimistic; I think this entry was mostly the depression talking

If you're not allowed to be pessimistic when you're depressed, when are you allowed to be? *g*

[erika]

Problem is I'm always depressed. That's the trouble with double depression! Nothing ever comes up roses.

[alwayswondered]

Lamictal was the first thing I tried and while the AD effects didn't kick in for me, the mood stabilising effects were noticeable. Perhaps ask about a combination of Lamictal and SSRIs (or other ADs)? OR SSRI+Wellbutrin (if you haven't tried them together before)?

Also, what rydra_wong said. I remember watching my friends hit on their wonder drugs and see results (overnight, it seemed) while I was still struggling and I was so fucking jealous and unhappy. I assumed there was something so badly wrong with me that nothing would ever help. Those friends said similar things to me, and they were right: there was something out there for me and I just hadn't blundered across it yet. There are still things you haven't tried; I know it's fucking wearying and awful, but keep fighting.

[erika]

Have tried many combinations of drugs. Should write an entry about that, actually. Abilify + Pristiq + Wellbutrin + Klonopin was my last combo.

Thank you for your support. I really appreciate it.

[mighty_claw]

i'm not sure how long AD's take to stop working. i'm on some prozac-like thing. i've missed a week once because i'm an idiot and kept forgetting to get them refilled, but i didn't feel much different.

[erika]

Well, it has to do with the half-life. Generally within 72 hours. Prozac takes a little longer but not much.

[mighty_claw]

reasons i should pay more attention to my doctor when she tells me things. i'm pretty sure it's prozac, but a different name brand of it. i never ask many questions about stuff like that. i'm just: "ok, i'll try to remember to take these every day".

[erika]

Not a big deal. You can look at your med bottle if you really want to know the name, and unless you're planning to titrate (come down in dosage) off the drug, you don't really need to know anything about half-lives. Even if you are titrating off, if you just follow your psychiatrist's instructions, you still don't really need to know anything about half-lives.

That's why they have the med degrees!