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erikaAdara came to visit. My younger sister, 4 years and 3 months younger, here for a week then off to South Korea for a whole year teaching English as a second language to elementary school kids.
It was good! Trav and I spent some nice time with her partner, who I'm lowkey (and openly) questioning whether he'll last long, mostly because I don't think he's putting out that life-transformational positive aura that surrounds my relationship with Trav and FUCK I want that for her.
Not all of it was good. We had a few disconnects, but at least we cleared the elephants out of the room before she left last Sunday.
It's clear when I'm around my family just how much being in California and letting the SC magic move in me has really changed me. Been to yoga 4 times in the last two weeks, a pace that's been pretty regular for me. While I wish I can do more, last week I interviewed during class (and today I got 3 fillings during it, ugh). Interviewing for a permanent shift in the place I already work is still anxiety provoking. I try to release, let it go. Haven't heard anything so I have to assume I didn't get the job, which sucks as I was actually confident this time that I was the most qualified candidate.
Other things I've been releasing: weight? I'm now at least 5lbs less than the weight on my driver's license, which was a big fat 50lb lie to start with. This is weird because I don't think I've been this fit or flexible since high school. Huh. Turns out eating healthy and exercising actually work for me, and I am not as unique a snowflake as I thought.
Bad test results from gynecologist: as of last Friday, apparently I have "A low-grade squamous intraepithelial lesion"! New procedure scheduled for Wednesday and I think the hardest part is going to be not fucking Trav for four days. You know, unless I'm in the 1% where this is actually cancer already.
Peter Newton: "No remorse. No if-onlys. Just the alertness of being."
Mignon McLaughlin: "Every day of our lives we are on the verge of making those slight changes that would make all the difference."
A. A. Milne: "You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."
Meister Eckhart: "Wisdom consists in doing the next thing you have to do, doing it with your whole heart, and finding delight in doing it."
It was good! Trav and I spent some nice time with her partner, who I'm lowkey (and openly) questioning whether he'll last long, mostly because I don't think he's putting out that life-transformational positive aura that surrounds my relationship with Trav and FUCK I want that for her.
Not all of it was good. We had a few disconnects, but at least we cleared the elephants out of the room before she left last Sunday.
It's clear when I'm around my family just how much being in California and letting the SC magic move in me has really changed me. Been to yoga 4 times in the last two weeks, a pace that's been pretty regular for me. While I wish I can do more, last week I interviewed during class (and today I got 3 fillings during it, ugh). Interviewing for a permanent shift in the place I already work is still anxiety provoking. I try to release, let it go. Haven't heard anything so I have to assume I didn't get the job, which sucks as I was actually confident this time that I was the most qualified candidate.
Other things I've been releasing: weight? I'm now at least 5lbs less than the weight on my driver's license, which was a big fat 50lb lie to start with. This is weird because I don't think I've been this fit or flexible since high school. Huh. Turns out eating healthy and exercising actually work for me, and I am not as unique a snowflake as I thought.
Bad test results from gynecologist: as of last Friday, apparently I have "A low-grade squamous intraepithelial lesion"! New procedure scheduled for Wednesday and I think the hardest part is going to be not fucking Trav for four days. You know, unless I'm in the 1% where this is actually cancer already.
Peter Newton: "No remorse. No if-onlys. Just the alertness of being."
Mignon McLaughlin: "Every day of our lives we are on the verge of making those slight changes that would make all the difference."
A. A. Milne: "You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."
Meister Eckhart: "Wisdom consists in doing the next thing you have to do, doing it with your whole heart, and finding delight in doing it."
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on Tuesday, February 26th, 2019 10:46 pm (UTC)no subject
on Tuesday, February 26th, 2019 11:02 pm (UTC)no subject
on Wednesday, February 27th, 2019 03:55 am (UTC)